Resources

I don’t have that many books on how to raise a toddler. In the past 2 years, I’ve bought four new books. See the list below. It’s really funny to note that I have about eight books on pregnancy and labor, but only four books dedicated to behavior and wellness. I have invested double the amount of money on an event that lasts for only 9 months instead of on raising a secure, healthy, well-behaved boy that be the foundation for his future successes. Looking back now, I feel a little bit selfish.

So I am asking everyone to share your favorite books, essays, blogs, newspaper articles (and more!) with me. Tell me about what you are reading and learning and I will post a list of everyone’s comments here. I hope we can create a database with a list of some best practices.

Books
What to Expect in the Toddler Years by Arlene Eisenberg, Heidi E. Murkoff, and Sandee E. Hathway BSN
Since the extended family no longer lives nearby, new parents often turn to books for advice on child care. These two new sources, although different in format and scope, provide useful information to parents with young children. The first volume of The Disney Encyclopedia of Baby and Child Care covers development from birth through age six, describing milestones and explaining care techniques. Boxes highlight important information. There are also sections on basic first aid and the common symptoms of childhood diseases. Volume 2 is an alphabetically arranged encyclopedia of child health and illness issues, with short entries on conditions and behaviors (e.g., aggression, toeing in, worms). A referral list of relevant organizations is included. The authors are pediatricians who provide current, high-quality information, but the material provided is at a ready-reference level. Readers seeking depth will need other sources, and this set lacks a bibliography

The Happiest Toddler on the Block by Harvey Karp, MD
California-based pediatrician Karp offers a unique approach to the tantrums, melt-downs and overriding challenges that often accompany the demanding years from one to four. Viewing toddlers as primitive thinkers akin to prehistoric man, Karp divides his patients into developmental groups: the “Charming Chimp-Child” (12 to 18 months), the “Knee-High Neanderthal” (18 to 24 months), the “Clever Cave-Kid” (24 to 36 months) and the “Versatile Villager” (36 to 48 months). Parents may find the toddler years so frustrating, Karp suggests, because they don’t speak their child’s language. To deal effectively with the undeveloped brains of toddlers, one must understand “Toddler-ese,” he says, a method of talking to youngsters that employs short phrases, repetition, a dramatic tone of voice and the use of body language. Although the author admits parents may feel foolish speaking in this manner, he nevertheless maintains that the approach soothes children by respecting their needs.

1-2-3 Magic: Effective Discipline for Children 2-12 by Thomas W. Phelan, Ph.d
Previously available as a booklet in conjunction with a workshop and as a video, clinical psychologist Phelan’s simple, effective child-management program has now been issued as a trade paperback. The gist of the plan is to enable parents to discipline children, ages 2 to 12, by instituting a system of counting and time-outs, delivered straightforwardly and unemotionally. How the regimen is used to stop undesirable behavior, stimulate desirable conduct, and cope with children’s testing is conveyed in Phelan’s candid style, filled with common sense, concrete examples, and lots of reassuring humor. Time-and parent-tested, the methods are applied in identifiable situations (pouting, bedtime, dressing) as well in the all-too familiar incidences of children testing and manipulating their elders. Best of all, the method enables parents to control their kids without yelling . . . or worse. In addition, Phelan covers homework, active listening, self-esteem, behavior in public, and the use of his method in schools.

The Modern Girl’s Guide to Motherhood by Jane Buckingham
Just when you thought you could cook (hey, one meal counts), clean (if the queen was coming), and seduce a man (well, long enough to get married), life throws you a curveball that makes all of your previous ineptitudes in life pale in comparison. With the appearance of one little extra line on a pregnancy test, you’re thrown into a world of covering up leaks on shirts and taking a pacifier away from a two-year-old who has the grip of a pit bull. In this funny, smart, and honest book, Jane Buckingham cuts through the clutter to give you simple information and practical advice for navigating the different stages of motherhood. From how to get your child to sleep and how to wean, to how to get him off the pacifier and how to stop his tantrums, this book will help moms feel in the know and in control!